currently listening to narda's salaguinto't salagubang (and will be listening to suwerte after this) -- e lent me his copies of these albums.
So far, am liking what am hearing ^_^ (thanks, e -- for the cds and for the oj ^_^)

* * *

Sonnet XVII by Pablo Neruda

I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz,
or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.
I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;
so I love you because I know no other way

than this: where I does not exist, nor you,
so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,
so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.

M dropped by the store today and had two Neruda compilations. He pointed me to this poem -- (hehehe, left me breathless -- ganda!)

and this one:

Sonnet LXXXI

And now you're mine. Rest with your dream in my dream.
Love and pain and work should all sleep, now.
The night turns on its invisible wheels,
and you are pure beside me as a sleeping amber.

No one else, Love, will sleep in my dreams. You will go,
we will go together, over the waters of time.
No one else will travel through the shadows with me,
only you, evergreen, ever sun, ever moon.

Your hands have already opened their delicate fists
and let their soft drifting signs drop away; your eyes closed like two gray
wings, and I move

after, following the folding water you carry, that carries
me away. The night, the world, the wind spin out their destiny.
Without you, I am your dream, only that, and that is all.

and I want someone to read this to me (preferably in Spanish):

Sonnet XI

I crave your mouth, your voice, your hair.
Silent and starving, I prowl through the streets.
Bread does not nourish me, dawn disrupts me, all day
I hunt for the liquid measure of your steps.

I hunger for your sleek laugh,
your hands the color of a savage harvest,
hunger for the pale stones of your fingernails,
I want to eat your skin like a whole almond.

I want to eat the sunbeam flaring in your lovely body,
the sovereign nose of your arrogant face,
I want to eat the fleeting shade of your lashes,

and I pace around hungry, sniffing the twilight,
hunting for you, for your hot heart,
like a puma in the barrens of Quitratue.

* * *

am in a reading rut right now -- ~sigh~ started and stopped so many books in the past two days. Thank goodness I managed to finish reading Philip Dick's Minority Report (just Minority Report)

M pointed me to a murder mystery book and I started reading it, but I had to stop -- I don't think it's its time to be read.

i. need. a. book. to. read. now. >_<

* * *

had orange juice with E in Starbucks. It is good to just sit down and be -- the words and thoughts just flow unguarded (and laughter flows freely as well) -- and you walk away feeling strangely more at ease with the world.

i asked him if he thought i was narcissistic and self-indulgent. no daw to the first but he thinks i'm an odd mix of self-indulgent and self-flagellating. i think he's right about that. there are days when i feel the need to either apologize for or explain my existence -- i don't know why, but i do -- sometimes.

It is during these days that you will see me agonize over my life and where it is going -- major stress. =P

During those other days, when I've probably argued it out in my head (that I am here and that there is a reason for my existence), you'll see me just act out of impulse and be utterly crazy (a rare occasion).

I'd like a middle ground, please. (with a side order of fries)

* * *

Tomorrow is Friday already -- how time flies.

And I'm glad they've decided to show Lost in Translation in the theaters. A must, must-watch! ^_^