Friday, December 10, 2010

December 8: Beautifully Different --

Think about what makes you different and what you do that lights people up. Reflect on all the things that make you different – you’ll find they’re what make you beautiful.
(Author: Karen Walrond)

My thoughts and ideas have always been a little different from everyone else's -- and that used to worry me so much (thinking why I'm the only one who see's it that way) -- but I'm not so worried anymore -- because I have been told by my family and the few friends I have that they appreciate my unique point of view.

I've never seen myself as beautiful and have never been told that I was beautiful (except by my husband who is legally and spiritually obligated to believe it) -- so it comes as a bit of a surprise when people exclaim how pretty Anya is and how she looks like me.

I have never aspired to be beautiful or to be adored by many -- I have always strived to be comfortable in my skin -- lately, I haven't been feeling this. I've let myself go and I'm heavier ... and I feel it. And I don't like it. (Which is why I'm walking -- I haven't actually lost any weight -- but I feel better about myself.)

As for lighting people up -- I'm afraid I don't. I have always had a somber and serious disposition. (There was this home video of me and my cousins when I was 10 -- my cousins and my brothers were all laughing it up and I was standing to one side of the garden, quietly looking on.)

I have a cousin who does this -- light up the room when she's there -- and it's wonderful to be around her. (I visit her in Cebu just for this. ^_^)

I do wish I were the same way ... but I'm not. I don't mind it, though -- at least I have someone in my life who provides me with sunshine. ^_^

No comments: