Wednesday, December 31, 2003


... just got back from Iloilo --

It was strange to see the airport so deserted (apparently, we were one of the last flights in).

Stranger still was the number of people travelling on the last day of the year --

It felt good to be back in the condo and was pleased to see how clean it was. (I think our housekeeper was happy to have us go off for a week, giving her the chance to clean the place thoroughly. Not that it's ever dirty -- more of organized chaos ^_^)

It's less than 5 hours before the start of a new year --

(...aren't I dash-happy? ^_^)

Decided to add to my lists

Things I'm looking forward to this coming year
5. Movies! (Want to watch School of Rock! And, read in an entertainment magazine that Hollywood has bought the license to My Sassy Girl and will be releasing their own version some -- erg...) Found out from E that there's an Infernal Affairs 3 (and Tony Leung Chiu Wai is in it -- h'ray!) ... and the Harry Potter movie looks promising
4. ***
3. Some milestones: the store is turning 2 (h'ray!), i'm turning 26 (h'ray! also), etc. etc.
2. Summer vacation! (Trying to decide where to go -- for some strange reason, this year, I seem to want to go to the beach...)
1. Passing the compre, defending my thesis and graduating

*** odd: when I was thinking about this list, I knew I had a lot of things that I was looking forward to, but I can't seem to recall a lot of them. Oh well...

Some resolutions
- find a balance in my life
I'm one of those people who tends to hyperfocus on things at the expense of everything else. I would like to be able to do the things I like and still have time to spend with friends, etc.

- learn something new
My friend and I are planning on taking some (*ahem*) dance lessons ... not sure if this will push through.

- be more patient

- watch a musical
One of the things I've sacrificed is this and I feel bad about it. I really should try to find time to watch one play/musical a quarter... of course, there is the issue of funds. ^_^

- laugh more, worry less


That's it for now. Happy New Year, folks! ^_^

Friday, December 26, 2003

...updating this while in Iloilo, on my bro's laptop with dial-up internet connection
~sigh~ I miss my DSL connection ^_^

Thought this would make an interesting list (from G's blog)

Best gifts received this Christmas
5. Mga Panibagong Kulam by Tony Perez (interesting gift from B -- no doubt, he now regrets giving this to me. ^_^)
4. knowing that J got his DSL; E and A with Siglo (am soooo happy for the two of them) -- knowing that the people around me are happy ^_^
3. being able to watch a premiere of LotR: RotK (getting to see the trailer for Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban) ^_^
2. being invited (and being able to attend) the CC party ^_^ -- L, next year, we will try to stay longer
1. the original .hack//sign OSTs (from my sister), a nice white Sony Cybershot (from my bros), the pink beaded watch, which I beaded myself (from my youngest bro)

... and my youngest bro gave me my birthday gift in advance -- the OST for The Classic (played it in the store when E was there and both of us got teary-eyed remembering the scenes from the movie ~sigh~)

An interesting situation--
So, I'm in Iloilo and all I can think of is what I would be doing if I were in Manila. When I'm in Manila, I miss being in Iloilo. B asked me what's in Iloilo that isn't in Manila and I replied: What's in Iloilo that isn't in Manila = What's in Manila that isn't in Iloilo" -- people. That's what tips and/or balances the scales for me, which is why I still haven't decided where to stay permanently.

A really outrageous solution is to stay in neither -- and I've joked about this for some time now. I should just pack my bags and move to Cebu or Davao or somewhere (as long as there's DSL and a decent bookstore, I will be happy).

Here's hoping I find an answer to this soon ^_^

* * *

Been on an anime-watching frenzy. Have seen and enjoyed:
1. Matantei Ragnarok Loki
2. Read or Dream (watched this twice na -- cool!)
3. Peace Maker Kurogane (OMG! L, you have to watch this one ^_^)
4. Gunslinger Girl (interesting/disturbing)

still have:
Witch Hunter Robin (not compelled to watch it -- kinda boring =P)
DN Angel
Samurai Deeper Kyo

... I've seen more anime in the past 3 days than I have in the past year.

Sunday, December 21, 2003

Hectic week--

Been running around this entire week, trying to catch up to a world that was moving much too fast. Had dinner with friends in Makati last Tuesday, attended a fun fun Christmas party Saturday afternoon and attended the launch of Siglo Saturday evening. In between, there were presents to be wrapped and business matters that needed to be settled before the year ended.

... and it is done. ~whew!~

On Tuesday, I go home to Iloilo where I will rest and read and spend the holidays with my family.

* * *

Siglo Launch

I attended the event with G and P. Am very very proud of E and A. (tears tears ^_^)

It was an interesting evening -- I've never been one for these types of social events, but I looked at it as another experience to write about. Had fun, got drinks for free, had my copy of Siglo signed.

It's a lovely book, well worth the PhP250 that you'll pay for it.

* * *

Thoughts for the end of another year

... I was going to write about my thoughts on turning older, but I realized I was contradicting myself. There's no easy way for me to talk about turning 26 without sounding crazy.

... so I will go sort my thoughts first, turn 26 and then come back to write about it. ^_^

* * *

Last of my lists:

Happy Thoughts
5. ...what A wrote on his page of my copy of Siglo (awkward phrase -- sorry!) -- Congrats A! You deserve this and so much more ^_^
4. getting really good seats for the premiere of Return of the King (and the crowd was so nice!). Since this is movie-related, will also add this: seeing Hero on the big screen twice and Possession once.
3. my life and the people I have in it right now (I want for nothing more ... seriously ^_^)
2. January 2003, Cafe Ysabel -- what a great way to turn 25 (to be with your friends and have dinner in a really nice place)
1. that my friends will break me out of prison if I ever find myself in one (long story*) -- my sister will try and will probably succeed. C and F will also give it a go (this would be fun to see). A will also try (but he'll be mad at me first and I will have to suffer a lecture and lots of "haynakus!" ^_^). J and B would also be an interesting pair to watch -- J would be OC and B would be zen ... but they would eventually get me out (... I hope ^_^).

*B asked me this question last night: If you were in prison for a crime punishable by the death penalty, who do you know would break you out without you having to ask them? I didn't hesitate to answer: My sister, first. C and F next. A after. J & B last. B said, he'd probably try but would have to get in line first. ^_^ (I have few friends, but I love them all dearly.)

Discoveries for 2003
5. Alabang isn't _that_ far away. (and my aunt's driver is usually free during weekends -- oh, the possibilities ^_^) Hehehe, I only go to Alabang once a year (and it's usually with a lot of preparation beforehand). This year, I decided to be zen about it and just go -- thoroughly enjoyed myself. Great way to spend a Saturday. ^_^ (Thanks, B)
4. How to take the MRT and LRT to Ongpin. E told me about this place in Ongpin that sells HK/Asian vcds. A was the only one brave enough to accompany me. ^_^ Now I usually go once a month. Best thing I bought from that place: My Sassy Girl (close second: The Classic -- starts crying again. ~sniff~)
3. HK/Korean/Japanese films -- haaaay, and I resisted them for sooo long (am so dense that way). My bro had to emotionally blackmail me into watching Who Are You? (If you love me, you will watch this with me -- trust me, this works. But only for my sibs)'s actually my bro, the History teacher, who has good taste in movies -- I just happen to be there when he watches them ^_^
2. Lomos -- a way for me to pretend to be artistic ^_^ I love my Holga and SuperSampler ^_^
1. Ilse! -- took me on a twirl through his wild wild world (great companion for walks around Ateneo/Katipunan; most unusual insights and conversation topics) ... a most excellent friend. ^_^

* * *

Am off to Iloilo tomorrow (it's Monday evening). Hope all of you have a wonderful Christmas!

To borrow a line from Tori Amos (actually, this is the song in my head right now) -- pretty good year. ^_^

See you all next year! ^_^

"The year's at the spring,
And day's at the morn;
Morning's at seven;
The hill-side's dew-pearled;
The lark's on the wing;
The snail's on the thorn;
God's in his Heaven -
All's right with the world!"
- Robert Browning

Thursday, December 18, 2003

One retains the strangest things when reading Lit Theory stuff...
Literature, according to these recent discourse theories, re-presents and refracts reality. Indeed, language itself constitutes reality; it also produces distortions... literature represents reality; but reality is grounded in convention, not nature and it is subject to illusion. - Norton Anthology of Theory and Criticism

Conversation with friend:
Me: am reading the Norton Anthology of Theory and Criticism and had a nice insight into Language -- language reflects reality, yet, at the same time, because of the use of tropes and whatnots, distorts it
B: define tropes and whatnots..
Me: i can't really -- but i can give a good example, for instance, in the sentence "i like you" -- the sentence seems simple enough -- very linear. there is an "i" who likes a "you" -- but liking someone is never _that_ simple di ba? -- this is where language deceives us but, at the same time, that _is_ reality -- there is no way to reflect how complicated it is to like someone ^_^
B: Also deceives us offhand because our cognitive functions assume we know what it means.
Me: yeah, see ^_^
B: We automatically assume certain things when the complexity of it demands rediscovery everytime.

* * *

Been busy these past few days -- but when I look back at it, I really don't remember what I've been doing. It's all been a blur of things that need to be done and things I did (for kicks).

Last Tuesday, I had dinner out with friends. We met up at Chicken Lickin' at the GT Tower foodcourt (nice place, btw). I usually don't like Makati, but, that evening, the city looked soooooo beautiful and the weather was perfect. I told my friend, "Okay, I will give you this. I love Makati tonight. But just tonight."


* * *

Thursday, December 11, 2003

Today I decided to walk barefoot in the Ateneo Lib.

Because the floor looked cold and nice to walk on with barefeet.
Because I miss walking on cold marble.
Because I've decided to stop worrying what other people might think of me.

So there I was, browsing through the Shakespeare collection with my slippers in one hand and the Norton Anthology of English Literature in the other. (When I have enough money, I will buy the entire Norton collection -- EVERYTHING they've ever printed. ^_^)

And I realized that people really didn't care -- a guy walked into that same aisle, looked around and left. All this time, I was worrying for nothing.

Shakespeare's Michael Cassio bemoans the loss of his reputation: "Reputation, reputation, reputation! O, I have lost my reputation! I have lost the immortal part of myself..." (Othello, Act 2, Scene 3) and I've always functioned along the same lines -- thinking that appearance is everything.

But there is more to life than worrying about this. (I've only realized this recently -- better late than never, right? ^_^)

When I got back to the store, I decided to walk around barefoot again.

Because it's my store? hehehehe ^_^
Seriously -- because it felt good.

* * *

More of my lists:

Things I did that I am most proud of
5. deciding to complete my MA (not that there was any doubt... but it was hard trying to motivate myself to work on that effing thesis)
4. ***
3. reading all the books I read this year (i love books ^_^)
2. completing chapter 1 of my thesis (yay! sa wakas!)
1. living my life ^_^ (h'ray for me)

*** I'm sure I've done a lot of things that I'm proud of, but what defined this year for me is my MA. I am on the verge of completing something that I've worked hard on for the past 3 years and all that stands in my way is a comprehensive exam, 4 chapters of a thesis and a defense.

Thursday, December 04, 2003

Got this from L's blog:

Love hurts, don't it? You're in pure love— the kind with sonnets and hovering cherubs— and you ache like an old man's back for your crush. The superficial things that other people care about— money, looks, body odor— don't hold much water with you. You wouldn't care if your dreamboat were the Exxon Valdez, so don't be surprised if you ever fall in love with an oily barge. Respect the twinkie, but don't ignore its needs.


* * *

At a time when everything else seems to be uncertain, I turn to (one of) my security blanket(s), the Rent OST, and remember that there is no day but today and life is mine to live. ^_^

* * *

Strange day in my part of QC:

Early in the morning, we hear that they found a dead body stuffed inside a balikbayan box somewhere along Katipunan, which was causing massive traffic (which is, really, never a surprise -- the traffic, I mean). This is, of course, unconfirmed. Will definitely check tomorrow's newspaper.

On our way home, there was a something happening in the flyover and we thought it was still the dead body (my sister and I were thinking, poor dead body) but it was another accident -- a truck had overturned (probably speeding ... tsk tsk).

Yellow Cab Pizza opened at around 330pm. (This last piece of news isn't really strange. ^_^)

* * *

More lists

Places in Katipunan
5. Rustan's Fresh (nothing cures a bad mood like a supermarket ^_^)
4. The Old Spaghetti House
3. Aeon Books (though I've only been there once)
2. Chocolate Kiss (in UP) / Starbucks
1. Natural Spa (in Rustan's Fresh)

yes, yes -- there is also Baci (formerly Encomium), Octopus and CCHQ ^_^
... I also like the chapel in Moro

Places elsewhere
5. my house! (hahahahahah ^_^)
4. the new wing in Galleria / Greenhills Theater Mall (row A!)
3. Podium (because of Banana Leaf Curry House, Hobbes and the National Bookstore there)
2. the new Greenbelt
1. Powerplant Mall (because of Fully Booked and being able to "buy the bucket" ^_^)

TV Shows
5. CSI: Miami
4. Amazing Race
3. Art Attack (on Disney)
2. Oprah / Cheers / Dharma and Greg (anything that shows from around 8 to 930am)
1. Buffy (season 6?) / CSI

Games (console, PC, online, etc.)
4. Sakura Taisen 1 on PS2
3. Neopets / Ragnarok Online
2. Sakura Taisen 4 on Dreamcast
1. Rise of Nations (thank God I can't play this on my PC -- addicting!)

Right now, it's just RO, though ~sigh~ ^_^
More lists...

5. Wonderful Days (an animated movie from Korea. the movie is so-so, but the OST is amazing!)
4. Daredevil (because of Evanescence's My Immortal)
3. Who Are You? / In the Mood for Love (~sigh~)
2. The Classic (but I haven't gotten a copy yet)
1. Children of Dune / Kill Bill (my sister and I are suffering from last song syndrome -- help!)

5. Come Away with Me by Norah Jones
4. White Flag by Dido
3. My Immortal by Evanescence
2. Kimi yo Hana yo (Sakura Taisen 4)
1. Taxi Ride by Tori Amos

* * *

Watched The Classic last night. Cried buckets. I hate it when a movie affects me this much. ~sigh~ ^_^

Tuesday, December 02, 2003

Realized today that it is already December and I wonder where the time went -- Tempus Fugit! ^_^

Haven't done any of my Christmas shopping yet (so unlike me, really -- normally, all gifts would be ready by sem break ~sigh~)

Here's the start of my top 5s for 2003.

Movies watched on video (VCD/DVD/VHS)
5. Balzac and the Little Chinese Seamstress
4. Wanee and Junah
3. Chinese Odyssey 2002
2. Who Are You?
1. My Sassy Girl / Finding Nemo / The Classic (added on December 4*)

... actually, it could have been an all-Wong Kar-Wai/Tony Leung Chiu-Wai list: (In the Mood for Love, Chungking Express, Days of Being Wild, etc. etc. ^_^)

*The Classic is another Korean film. Damn it, this movie made me cry so hard my head hurt. ~sigh~

Movies watched on the big screen
5. Possession
4. League of the Extraordinary Gentlemen
3. X2
2. Hero
1. Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers / Kill Bill vol 1

Movies that I wanted to watch but didn't/haven't (and are either not out on video or I just haven't gotten a copy)
5. The Shape of Things (from Neil LaBute, director of Possession)
4. Pirates of the Carribean
3. Warriors of Heaven and Earth
2. Infernal Affairs 2
1. Runaway Jury / Battle Royale 2

... there's also Chicago, Down with Love, (would you believe Gangs of New York?), etc. etc.

Cartoon shows
5. Madeline (Disney)
4, Spongebob Squarepants (Nickelodeon)
3. Mr. Bean (Disney)
2. Fairly Oddparents (Nickelodeon)
1. As Told by Ginger (Nickelodeon)

... also X-Men Evolution (Cartoon Network) and The Wild Thornberry's (Nickelodeon)

Comic Series
5. League of the Extraordinary Gentlemen / Courtney Crumrin
4. Ultimates
3. Runaways / New Mutants
2. Batgirl (Dylan Horrocks' run)
1. Fables

... I know New X-Men should be on this list, but I haven't gotten around to reading it yet. I've only read the first issue of Ultimate X-Men, but it started out well and I want to read more ^_^

... there's also Y the Last Man and Daredevil (and for Japanese manga: Fruits Basket, Sakura Taisen and Kareshi Kanojo no Jijyo)

Gadgets I lusted over
5. optical wheel mouse (thanks to B for recommending one to me ^_^)
4. my bro's laptop (super souped-up!)
3. Ericsson P800 or P900
2. Sony Cybershot -- cuuuuuuuute! I was able to carry one in my small handbag ^_^
1. Lomo cameras!

... list will be continued ^_^

Monday, December 01, 2003

Currently listening to: Tori Amos's Taxi Ride (her new album, Tales from a Librarian is out in the US.)

Last night, our internet connection was buggy so we decided to log off and watch TV. MYX was showing the music video of My Immortal by Evanescence (from the Daredevil OST). It's a really lovely song ... sad, haunting, etc. etc. Seeing the video reminded us that we hadn't watched our Daredevil R3 DVD, so we ended up watching it with Tagalog subtitles. ^_^ The translation was pretty good -- there were some parts na sablay (Daredevil: I grew up in the Kitchen = Lumaki ako sa kusina ^_^).

I spent my Saturday in Alabang (was pleasantly surprised that, despite the traffic, I still got there in about an hour) and met up with friends. Being around them (two sets of friends) made me realize just how much I have to be grateful for (I love my friends! ^_^).

I remember a conversion I had with A about two weeks ago:

Me: How do I look?
A: You look like someone who's happy, but doesn't know what to do with that fact.

... how does one reply to that? I just smiled. ^_^

Truth is, I'm very suspicious of happiness because there's always a catch to it; there are always strings attached (and I'd rather be untangled). A few months ago, I gave up a perfectly good chance to go on a trip because I couldn't handle the spontaneous show of generosity. Right now (I've adpated a new POV), I am simply enjoying the ride. There may be a catch to all this down the road, but I'll deal with that when I get there. ^_^

* * *

My friend C posted this on her friendster bulletin board. C was a good friend in college, but we lost touch when we graduated. We bumped into each other again at the recollection. ^_^

1. List five things you'd like to accomplish by the end of the year.
- finish reading for the theory part of my comprehensive exam
- organize the bookshelves and the video shelf (ugh!)
- find time to have lunch/dinner with all of my friends
- visit my teacher friends in Xavier
- pRO-related = forge!

2. List five people you've lost contact with that you'd like to hear from again.
- well, C was one of them
- Abbie, a good friend from high school
- Cheng, another good friend from high school
- Jay P. (but he texted last Saturday, so ...)
- Jay L.

3. List five things you'd like to learn how to do.
- drive
- make creme brulee
- polaroid transfers (for people who've seen Crazy/Beautiful, Kirsten Dunst takes a polaroid picture of a sleeping Jay Hernandez and then proceeds to transfer the image to her notebook.)
- dance? hahahaha ^_^
- speak another language fluently

4. List five things you'd do if you won the lottery (no limit).
- charity (the orphanage in Iloilo and the home for old folks, the Ateneo Scholar's Fund, etc.)
- set up funds for people who need it (people with great ideas, etc.) / pay for my godchildren's education
- travel!
- set up a retirement fund for all of my teachers and yayas
- save the rest

5. List five things you do that help you relax.
- spa! (massage = an hour of heaven -- with a small H ^_^)
- read / write down thoughts
- go on a walk (especially around Ateneo/Katipunan)
- have a good meal / go shopping (window shopping is ok, but it's even better when I have money ^_^)
- ask for hugs ^_^

Wednesday, November 26, 2003

Just had to share this -- it's the latest issue of Runaways and the covers are done by Jo Chen. Isn't it pretty? ^_^

* * *

And, FINALLY, Matthew Arnold writes something interesting:
... we have to turn to poetry to interpret life for us, to console us, to sustain us. Without poetry, our science will appear incomplete; and most of what now passes with us for religion and philosophy will be replaced by poetry.

I still have to plod through his Culture and Anarchy. ~sigh~

I think next on my list is TS Eliot.

* * *

What .hack//SIGN Character Are You?

You excel at Transfiguration. One of the most
dificult classes, you seem to be a natural at
turning a coke bottle into a homework pass.

Which Class at Hogwarts Would You Excel at?
brought to you by Quizilla

* * *

Am getting ready to make a list of the things that defined 2003 for me. (Can't believe there's only a month left!)

Monday, November 24, 2003

"Release" will be at Ebisu, Jupiter St. tomorrow night, November 25, at 10PM. 2 sets of unplugged

This is the group that provided the OST for my four years in college. For people able to go, try to -- this is a really great group and you won't regret going. (I wish I could go, but I'll be too sleepy to appreciate the music. ~sigh~)

* * *

The recollection was great. (I got some much-needed spiritual rejuvenation. ^_^) I also got to meet up with friends (7 from my batch attended ^_^), which is always excellent.

* * *

To answer G's question, I haven't progressed with my NaNoWriMo writing. I had intended to use my time alone in Burgundy to write, but I fell asleep way too early. I have a lot of story starts, but I haven't really written anything beyond that.

B has given me a story idea and I am trying to see if I can write it.

Meanwhile, I am writing a lot of other things (I wrote my thoughts on Early Mornings in Katipunan Avenue and some other stuff.)


I am not discouraged -- Samuel Johnson wrote Rasselas in a week. I can do something in the same amount of time (or am hoping to do something ...)

* * *

Currently reading Salt: A World History by Mark Kurlansky, which I found at Fully Booked. Intriguing book. Am in the first chapter and it's making me crave salty stuff. (help!)

Wednesday, November 19, 2003

C posted this on the Friendster bulletin board --

last cigarette: i don't smoke
last kiss: do besos count?
last good cry: did get teary-eyed in some scenes of Matrix Revolutions / My Sassy Girl?
last library book(s) checked out: some books by Michel Foucault
last movie seen: Matrix Revolutions! (J visited us yesterday and we had a non-spoiler discussion of it -- siyempre, my sister and I couldn't stand it na so, after the store closed, we went to Theater Mall to watch it ^_^)
last cuss word uttered: i say a lot -- especially when going through Santolan and having to contend with really stupid drivers
last drink: hot chocolate from Delifrance!
last food consumed: chicken mayo on ciabatta from Delifrance
last crush: ?
last phone call: to our housekeeper informing her that we wouldn't be home for dinner last night
last tv show watched: Mr. Bean the Animated Series
last time showered: a few minutes ago
last shoes worn: birks
last cd played: Lisa Ono (Bossa Nova)
last item bought: notepad and a pen
last downloaded: ?
last annoyance: i try not to be so annoyed these days
last thing wriitten: this entry? some pRO-related stuff
last sleep: 8 hours ago
last chatted with: online? in person? my sister
last sexual fantasy: ... ^_^
last weird encounter: ?
last ice cream eaten: been a while.
last time amused: i am amused all the time ^_^
last time wanting to die: not in a really, really long time ^_^
last time hugged: last night
last time scolded: the housekeeper, pero light scolding lang
last chair sat in: this one
last shirt worn: the bear shirt I bought in Cam
last poster looked at: the movie posters in Theater Mall (one that stood out was Tom Cruise's The Last Samurai)
last show attended: Rent concert at Greenbelt? been such a looooong time!
last song: well, Matrix Revolutions -- great soundtrack ^_^

* * *

I enjoyed Matrix Revolutions ^_^

Monday, November 17, 2003

Last Saturday, we held the Black Hand pre-release tourney at the store. It was exhausting! (But we had a LOT of fun. It was nice seeing some players again -- so many of them we hadn't seen in MONTHS. ^_^)

Wanted to share the image above because I made it. ^_^ (I never knew you could scan a film negative and have that effect. Sobra akong natuwa ^_^)

* * *

Finished reading Nick Hornby's 31 Songs. Now I'm reading Harriet the Spy.

In compre news:
I also finished Samuel Johnson's Rasselas and am now reading William Wordsworth "Preface to the Lyrical Ballads". ~so many things to read ^_^~

* * *

From zero to hectic:
For the past few weeks, I've been idle socially (did this make sense? oh well) -- except for meeting up with my friend F for reg and lunch last week, I haven't seen any of my friends in a really long time (we keep making plans, but our skeds just don't match ~sigh~).

This week, however, promises to be busy:
- meet with C (friend whom I haven't seen in a REALLY long time. She's back in town filming a documentary) and possibly Dr. B (dept head/college thesis advisor and one of my favorite AdMU faculty ^_^)

- meet with C who's teaching a class in Ateneo again this semester. (Another friend e-mailed asking if we could meet for dinner in Makati -- I asked her if we could meet next Tuesday instead and if we could do lunch)

- Alumni Recollection in AdMU

For those interested:
Date: Saturday, 22 November 2003
Recollection Master: Fr. Thomas H. Green, S.J., Spiritual Director, San Jose Major Seminary
Theme: The Basics of Ignatian Incarnational Prayer
Venue: Ateneo-Splash Foundation West Room, Second Floor, Moro Lorenzo Sports Center

8:30- 9:00 Registration.
9:00-12:00 Recollection, Reflection, Confession
12:00- 1:30 Lunch for those with reservations
1:30- 3:30 Continuation of Recollection
3:30- 4:00 Mass at the Prayer Room, Moro Lorenzo Sports Center

Telephone: 426-6001 local 4089 (Lara), 4083 (Jeng), 4084 (Mercy)

* * *

Last Thursday, my sister and I made an early morning trip to Antipolo. For the first time (in our short history here in Metro Manila), we rolled down our windows and enjoyed cool, fresh air. The place we visited was beautiful! I took lots of pictures and can't wait to have them developed. ^_^

Friday, November 14, 2003

Check this out.

* * *

Instructions: Choose a singer/band/musician and answer only in song titles or album titles by them:

I choose: Tori Amos!

1. Are you male or female?
Cornflake Girl

2. How old are you?
Pretty Good Year ^_^

3. Describe yourself:
A Sorta Fairytale / Silent All These Years / Happy Phantom

4. How do some people feel about you?
(maybe we should ask them? ^_^) Professional Widow? hahahaha =D / Strange Little Girl

5. How do you feel about yourself?
Winter / Caught A Lite Sneeze / Precious Things / China

6. Describe your ex:
Past the Mission / Crucify (bitter ba? ^_^)

7. Describe your views on significant others and crushes:
Precious Things

8. Describe what you want:
Spark / Bliss

9. Describe how you live:
Taxi Ride / Winter

10.Describe how you love:
Losing My Religion (she has a version of this song ^_^)

11. Share a few words of wisdom:
"if the divine master plan is perfection
maybe next i'll give judas a try"

"so we go from year to year
with secrets we've been

"Seems as if we're
circling for very
different reasons "

"when you gonna make up your mind
when you gonna love you as much as i do
when you gonna make up your mind
cause things are gonna change so fast"

Wednesday, November 12, 2003

You are King's Quest!
You are King's Quest. Peabo Bryson sings for you.

Which Sierra On-Line adventure series are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Happy Deathday!
Your name:kiteflying
You will die on:Friday, March 11, 2033
You will die of:Serial Killer Victim
Created by Quill

* * *

Got these from J's LJ. I thought the questions were interesting, so...

1) Describe your ideal weather conditions.
Today (November 12, Wednesday) was close to perfect -- it wasn't too wet or too hot. It was pleasant for walks or for staying in.

2) Who is your favorite character from a movie?
Holly Golightly from Breakfast at Tiffany's, Flying Snow (Maggie Cheung's character) in Hero, GoGo in Kill Bill, Dory from Finding Nemo (~just keep swimming, just keep swimming~)

3) What are three things you'd like to do before you turn 30?
i. backpack through Europe -- visit the Louvre, Stratford (also watch a Shakespearean play at The Globe), Sistine Chapel (and take more time to look at the ceiling this time ^_^)
ii. learn how to make souffle and good creme brulee
iii. visit Japan and watch a Sakura Taisen live action play

4) What are you looking forward to about going back to college? (to focus on the positive aspects!)
odd question -- what i like about being back in Loyola Heights for my MA is the chance to walk that quiet, secluded, out-of-the-way path from de la Costa to the overpass (time for contemplation).

5) What one object that you own do you have the most attachment to and why?
my sanity? hahahaha! ^_^

An object? I thought I lost my pillow (childhood relic) when I was at Cambridge and I was crying over the loss, but after a while, I realized that we lose objects to make room for new things (rationalized it) -- buti na lang, the cleaning lady discovered it in the pile of dirty sheets and returned it to me (whew!). (Couldn't sleep! had to hug a book, which approximates it's size)

I get attached to people and would be devastated if I lost them, but not objects.

* * *

1. Name one song you hate to admit you like.
OMG! Backstreet Boys' All I Have to Give

2. Name two songs that always make you cry.
Mancini's Moon River
Tori Amos' Winter/Silent All These Years

(also, Jonathan Larson's I'll Cover You from RENT, Chopin's Impromptu-Fantasie)

3. Name three songs that turn you on.
DMB's Crash Into Me
Texas' In Demand
3EB's Deep Inside of You

(also, the theme from In the Mood for Love)

4. Name four songs that always make you feel good.
Bruce Springsteen's Secret Garden
The Corrs' What Can I Do
Oji Hiroi's So Special A Day (from the Sakura Taisen Kiseki no Kane concert)
Jonathan Larson's La Vie Boheme and Seasons of Love from RENT

5. Name five songs you couldn't ever do without.
Everything from RENT
DMB's Crash Into Me
Tori Amos' Taxi Ride (actually, Everything by Tori Amos)
(I know this shouldn't count, but) Beethoven's 9th Symphony, Chorale
Yuko Sasaki's Pure Snow

* * *

The Garage (JesCom Creative Technologies) is holding a series of workshop this November and December for:
Macromedia Flash (17 - 21 November, 530 to 730pm)
Adobe Photoshop (24 - 28 November, 530 to 730pm) - a friend is teaching this class ^_^
Web Design - Dreamweaver (1 - 5 December, 530 to 730pm)
Adobe Illustrator (8 - 12 December, 530 to 730pm)

at: The Garage Building, Seminary Drive (behind Sonolux)

For more info: 4265971 to 72;

* * *

Currently reading: Samuel Johnson's The History of Rasselas -- which I am enjoying ^_^

Saturday, November 08, 2003

Making Time

Look at what I made:
Hours of me wrapped in gift paper--

Time will alter itself to suit us
Allowing us to linger and savor the presence of each other
We will share our lifetimes over iced tea and cake, and
Cram past lives and laughter into the minutes
In the seconds, we will pause to seek out
Hidden meanings and innuendoes

Until the ice cubes melt
And there is nothing left to consume but crumbs


* * *

Listening to:
Taxi Ride and A Sorta Fairytale by Tori Amos

* * *

Been reading Endless Vow: The Zen Path of Soen Nakagawa before I sleep. It's interesting -- it's this Buddhist monk's diary and he writes about his experiences through haiku. I enjoy the brief moment of contemplation it gives me every evening.

An interesting entry:
"Having left in the evening, I arrive at noon of the same day. If you take a jet, it is possible for you to arrive before you have left! Past and future are all cut off." - Soen Nakagawa

B and I once had a discussion about the flow of time -- a fascinating subject: if we chart the flow of time, what would we discover? Does time move in a straight line? Or in a spiral?

I've always believed that time does not move in a straight line. From 9:00am to 9:01am, many things come into the picture -- we think about the past and our future. There is a constant reaching back and reaching forward. Our memories/past pervades into our present (which explains, rather simplistically, Dali's Persistence of Memories -- am sure there's a deeper meaning, but am happy with this one in the meantime ^_^)

Re: the poem -- I've become fascinated with the image of 'making time' to do things. Something so arts-and-craftsy about the whole notion of having to make time -- so much you can do with it. ^_^

* * *

Yes, I said this --
You can find a lot of poppycock these days. (By poppycock, I mean the caramel popcorn with nuts, which you can buy by the box -- glorious sugar fix!)

When I said this to B this morning, he had to stop and think about it first. Had to clarify that I wasn't making a political statement, but a craving-for-sugar one. ^_^

Friday, November 07, 2003

Currently loving: Shizukana Hibi no Kaidan Wo (The Steps of Quiet Days) by Dragon Ash (End theme from Battle Royale)

The video for Battle Royale 2 will be released on November 11. ^_^

* * *

Webcomics I read:
Heart of the City
Pop Culture (not a comic)

This is a fun strip. Too bad you have to pay to read more.

* * *

I finished registering after 3 days -- normally, for grad students, it shouldn't take more than 20 minutes, but if you're like me who didn't bother finding out reg procedures, etc. etc., it takes 3 days. ^_^

But it was a fun three days -- day 2, I shared with my friend F who is also taking her compre this February. Too bad she's in Ed -- still don't have a compre review partner (not that I need one, really).

* * *

Too bad my scanner doesn't scan pictures properly anymore ~sigh~. I did submit a shot to this month's LomoMission. ^_^

Wednesday, November 05, 2003

Ah, the music has changed -- slightly:
I am the One by Crackout
All I Want is You by U2
Come Away with Me by Norah Jones (there's something about the transition from U2's AIWIY to Norah Jones' CAWM that is so breathtaking ^_^)
Dreams by Cranberries
Story of a Girl by Nine Days
That Day by Natalie Imbruglia
Spark by Tori Amos

* * *

Had to share this... (Ty, to P for posting this on my Friendster board)

by Franz Wright

And you will find me
any night
now, try
at the motherless sky.

How dare you

IĆ¢€™m sorry
I was ever

No doubt
You can always find
Me any
Time, any

In the damned world

* * *

Well, today is the day for Revolution (Matrix, that is). Maybe if my sister and I get insanely bored today we might consider watching the 10pm show ... and maybe we won't. ^_^

I am excited for this, but will probably wait a week or two before watching it. (I don't appreciate paying x amount of money to go to the theater to hear other people talk or watch other people fiddle with their phones.)

Got treated to a visit from J and B yesterday and it was a wonderful reward after plodding through Sir Philip Sidney's "Defense of Poesie," which I finished reading. (H'ray for me!) Today, I'll be reading Alexander Pope.

* * *

For those of you wondering how goes the sharing of poetry dog tags, well here's what's been given away:
history beyond insanity - my bro, R
desire - P
end - Z
existence - A (gives great tarot readings ^_^)
fool - C
pain/inferno - D
karma - C
liquid - B (who does supreme work ^_^)
plant - my bro, N
rain - B
reveal - G
sparkle - C
strange - M
time - J
universe - E
why me - A

... did I miss anyone? Apologies, it is 7am and my mind isn't completely awake yet. But let me know if I missed anyone. I'd like to keep a record of this (and test how well my memory can handle this ^_^)

* * *

I really should be writing the work that needs to be done for NaNoWriMo. I'm deciding whether I should post the prelude of the story here. I have a superstition kasi about unfinished work being posted, so I wonder if I should tempt the fates.

Monday, November 03, 2003

* * *
Quote for the day:

... as a writer, I don't normally have much patience for the ineffable -- I ought to think that everything's effing effable, otherwise what's the point?

- Nick Hornby, 31 Songs

Sunday, November 02, 2003

Currently listening to:
"If I Am" by Nine Days
"Come Back to Me" by M-Flo
"Spark" by Tori Amos
"Rumble Fish" by Do As Infinity

Just wanted to share this image. My bro took this picture just as we were leaving the hotel. I just love how the movement was captured in this picture. ^_^

So I am writing this and clicking away using my new optical wheel mouse (thanks to B for the price list and for suggestions ^_^) -- still trying to get used to it, but it fills the current need. ^_^

* * *

Was at Fully Booked today and planned to buy AS Byatt's other books. It turns out there's a boxed set of the only series she wrote. Decided not to get it yet, though -- took me two years (yes, two years) to finish reading her A Biographer's Tale. Figured it would take that much time to read the other books (and there are four of them in that series!).

Settled for Amanda Brown's Legally Blonde. (Yes, this is where the movie was based on.) There were soooo many nice books there! (curses...)

Had Dencio's sisig for the first time. Remembered reading a survey on the best sisig in town and Dencio's was mentioned. It was yummy!

* * *

Some insight:

indulge me ^_^

I realized that I need to trust people more. I don't know when it was when I lost faith in the world, but that's where I am right now. When A gave me the tarot reading, the card that really stood out for me was Ice-olation. It was the image of a person curled up, frozen inside a block of ice.

That's how I feel most of the time -- I've become ice.

I guess this is the source of my stress. I guess this why my shoulders hurt and why I worry all the time.


I want to put down the barriers. I really do. But where does one start?

Saturday, November 01, 2003

Quizzie goodness

*Professional Widow Faerie*
You are Professional Widow Faerie! You don't take
anyone's shit. You are strong and beautiful and
can be dangerous as well. Check out this song
to find your own personal meaning.

~Which Tori Amos Faerie Are You~
brought to you by Quizilla

Team leader Mina Murray
---Mina Murray: Shrewd Leader---
An encounter some years ago killed the innocent
Mina Harker, leaving a world-weary, deeply
scarred Mina Murray, who divorces her husband
and rejects the scorn of high society to help
the innocent ad protect the commonwealth. Your
stern leadership and forceful presence are the
glue that keeps the league together, exceeding
all expectations. The world, however, is still
a harsh place for a divorce' with no
superpowers, and, after all, no woman is an

The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen: which "League" member are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Friday, October 31, 2003

In the spirit of the holiday:

Find out which tNBC song you are!

Quiz by JessieofTR.

You are Jack Skellington...the Pumpkin King. You
have a soulful side which you show to almost
nobody and constantly long for something other
than your mundane existence. You deeply crave
something which you feel your present situation
doesn't provide you, and so you are constantly
on the lookout for any new, exciting
opportunties that could brighten your life.
Occasionally oblivious to the feelings of
others, you are generally a decent person who
cares about doing the right thing.

What character from The Nightmare Before Christmas Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Happy Halloween, everyone!

* * *

Finished reading Nick Hornby's How to Be Good. Moving on to his 31 Songs. Had originally intended to find a copy of all 31 songs, but realized that that would be a difficult and time-consuming task. ~sigh~

Tomorrow is Day 1 of NaNoWriMo. Here's hoping the idea comes out of my head. ^_^

* * *

Tried to punch my friend today. (He let me.) Found out that:
1. I have bad aim. (Didn't connect with his arm. =P)
2. I don't know how to make a proper fist.
3. I hurt myself more than I did him.
4. What I could visualize in my head isn't what I could actually do. (It looked so easy in my head pa naman. I thought I had it all figured out. Oh well.)

So, in the case of being mugged (knock wood) I can defend myself if:
1. The other person is bigger (so I have a bigger target)
2. Doesn't move very much (because I can only connect my punch if I do it slowly)

If all else fails, I have mace. ^_^

* * *

Still sick. Tried to get orange juice, but there sems to be a shortage. I went to Unimart and they had nada. Went to Rustan's Fresh and all they had was Mango Juice. Tried the Mercury Drug near my place and all they had was the yogurt drink. =P

I need my orange juice.

Wednesday, October 29, 2003


Am sick. I can't believe it. (Well, actually I do believe it. I haven't been taking my vitamin C lately. ~sigh~)

And now I am sitting here, with my mug of Lo Han Kou. My throat hurts. =(

* * *

Couldn't resist it--

Had to get Nick Hornby's 31 Songs. Am wondering if this and Songbook are the exact same book with a different title. Curious.

Am reading his How to be Good and enjoying it. ^_^

* * *

A gave me a tarot reading today. (Thanks, A!) Very interesting (and accurate).
Some of the significant cards:
- Healing
- Ice-solation
- Mind
- Trust

* * *

And I have my story idea for NaNoWriMo. ^_^ (Can't wait for November ^_^)

Finally finished reading AS Byatt's A Biographer's Tale. It wasn't as "wow!" as Possession, but it had it's own charm.

Favorite quote:
There are two ways in which a man can be himself.
A right way and a wrong way.
You may know that a man in Paris
Has discovered a way of taking portraits
With the help of the sun. Either one can produce
A direct picture, or else what they call a negative.
In the latter, light and dark are reversed;
And the result, to the ordinary eye, is ugly.
But the image of the original is there.
All that's required is to develop it.
-AS Byatt, A Biographer's Tale p.178

* * *

For fans of Nick Hornby, his new book is out. It's called 31 Songs. For more info, click here. I found a copy in NBS-Katipunan, but decided against buying it because I still haven't read his "How to be Good."

He has this other book that I want: it's a collection of essays called Songbook, which contains a CD of some of the songs he writes about.

From his mini-site at Penguin:
Saint or Sinner Quiz Result:
Butter wouldn't melt
You are clearly DJ GoodNews, so sickly sweet that you make our teeth hurt! Doesn't being so righteous get tiring after a while? Why not get drunk, have an affair or skip work - anything to break that holier-than-thou routine! Perhaps you should take a leaf out of Katie Carr's book and think of yourself first for a change. Stop giving all your money to charity and buy yourself a treat with the money you save. Being so good the rest of the time means you deserve one.

Go visit. ^_^ (Try talking to DJ GoodNews)

* * *

Found out last night that my MP3 player is dead. It was 4 years old. Guess I had it coming -- I just left it around and didn't really bother to check if it was still alive. Apparently, the battery leaked (eewww =P) and there was a strange jingling sound inside the case.

It's a bad habit (I know, I know): I leave things behind, expecting them to still be in one piece when I get back to them again. Most of the time, they are still alive ... but there are these other times.

Oh well.

Monday, October 27, 2003

... kasi si G, nagsulat tungkol sa lollipop... ^_^


An accidental
excess of passion

An imprint
of what was
and what will be

(A whispered promise)

Your body is my canvas.

-6.7.99 (revised 10.27.2003)

* * *

Quote for the day:
Nod if you're fairly odd. - Fairly Oddparents
(The ten-hour marathon is this November 1, 10am on Nickelodeon. Oh joy, oh jubilation. ^_^)

Sunday, October 26, 2003


-Bacolod, Summer 1996
Summer after sophomore year, I took a trip with my barkada to Bacolod and we stayed over at my friend's house. Apparently the house was haunted and we wanted to see the ghost. (We had just come from a night out). So we waited until witching hour (3am?) and, obviously, didn't get to see anything. So we just talked and talked until the sun rose.

(I am laughing inside my head, remembering EVERYTHING that happened that day. Ah, the memories. ^_^)

-Davao Pearl Farm
I don't remember when we went, but I was there with my family. (They have very good bacon there. ^_^) We took the earliest flight out of Manila and I got to see the sun rise from an airplane. (A really beautiful sight) The sunsets in Davao were also amazing. This one afternoon (at band camp -- not!), we were on the beach and it was a fairly cloudy day, but the sun was peeking through some of the clouds. So there would just be these areas of sunlight on the beach. And we sat in one of those spots and waited for the sun to set. It's amazing how many colors the sky turns before becoming black (well, purplish really).

This is why I love being near the water (I can't swim, but I like beaches) -- something about nature that just reassures me that everything will be okay. It amazes me how things fall into place in the great big world (I have reflections on train rides and the color of grass, etc. etc. -- just ask me if you care to know. ^_^)

-San Juan, Summer 1998
We had a mahjong party at my cousin's house. It was a few days after we had graduated, so we were all in the mood to celebrate (we had discovered Absolut Kurant with Sprite and the joys of Tequila and Cali -- hahahahaha!). Most of our friends left at around 2 or 3, but two friends stayed. (K and A) We talked about EVERYTHING that morning. I remember that I had an early flight to Iloilo and had to be up by 6. They just waited until it was time for me to leave. (I love my friends. ^_^)

-Summer, 2000
I had quit my job at Xavier and was waiting to go to Cambridge, so I spent the summer with K because everyone else had work. After one of those evenings out, I got home just when the joggers were doing their daily run around the Xavier block. (I've also seen a sunset with this guy... which is why, ~sigh~ ^_^)

- October 18, 2003
Considering I only had a weekend in HK, we decided to take the earliest flight out. Didn't even think about how Bush's visit would affect me. So my flight was booked and my money converted -- when people started asking me whether it was a good idea to be near the airport on the day of "the visit". I told them that my flight was really early in the morning and that I didn't think so.

Ha. Famous last words.

Good thing we got fetched early and (because it was 2xp/drop in Loki -- hee hee ^_^) we were up really, really early. The traffic to the airport was terrible! What should have been a straight line from point A (my house in San Juan) to point B (Terminal 2 of the new airport) became this convoluted (read: takes more time) route.

What annoyed me even more was seeing all these MMDA people covering up the "view" (squatters area) and cleaning up. It annoyed me thinking about how much money was spent for one person who was going to be here for less than a day.

But I got to the airport and everything went well. This was the first time, in a very long time, that I took PAL on an international flight. I had forgotten why I never took them (and then got reminded -- no inflight entertainment. =P Was counting to watch Nick LaBute's new movie pa naman. ~sigh~)

* * *

Word in my head right now: immutable.

* * *

And something my friend N posted:

who invented the flourescent bulb?
which king in a standard deck of playing cards is known as the "suicide king?"
who is prince adam's pet cat in the cartoon he-man?
what is the medical term for the armpit?

for those who haven't heard of it, Quiz Night
rules are as follows:
-the game is open to groups of 6 or less.
-a 60 trivia questions will be asked.
-highest number of correct answers win

The Craic
top floor above Max Fried Chicken
Jupiter Street
8:30pm (promptly)
october the 29th

Friday, October 24, 2003

You know at the end of the day,
When you close the door and you're all alone...
and you strip off your armor and lower your guard and peel away the mask...
When there's nobody watching and nothing to hide...
and you no longer need to be strong or clever or pretty or brave...
There's just you.
That's it.
That's the soul.
- Oracle, Batgirl #45 (Dylan Horrocks, writer)

* * *

So many things happening!

October 25 is World Toy Camera Day. Read more about it here. I have a fresh roll of film in my Holga and C gave me a roll of B&W T400.

October 31 - Scary Godmother (the animated series) premieres on the Disney Channel at 9pm

November 5 - my friend is part of a group show at Gallery Nine, SM Megamall at 6 pm. (This is also opening day of Matrix Revolutions. H'ray!)

* * *

I worry for our country. All this politicking can't be healthy for us.

Now they're impeaching Davide. Who'll be next?


Wednesday, October 22, 2003

C talks about this in his blog: NaNoWriMo is starting in two weeks. I wasn't able to participate last year because I found out too late and I was busy, but I promised myself that I was going to join this year.

Now I have to think of something to write about. ^_^

* * *

And for the curious, click here. (Latest entry)

* * *

Nobody has ever had as many yesterdays as I have had... - Leto, Frank Herbert's God Emperor of Dune

Monday, October 20, 2003

Am back!

What a weekend! (It's amazing how much you can cram into a total of 48 hours when you put your mind to it. ^_^)

Kill Bill! - Chiaki Kuriyama (Go Go) was amazing! (And the soundtrack was excellent!) ... erm, won't talk about this movie for now. (Got so much I want to say, though)

Nick Bantock's final installment to the Griffin and Sabine sequel: The Morning Star (comes after Gryphon & Alexandria)

Finding two game magazines with RO-related articles inside. (Will discuss this more in my other blog ^_^)

M&M Peanut Butter! -- discovered this in Europe a long, long time ago. Have a hard time finding this locally.

Poetry Dogtags! -- very, very cute. Dogtags with a word written on it. You can string together a bunch of them to express yourself. Just thought it was very, very cute. (Yes, yes, redundant -- but it _is_ very, very cute. ^_^)

* * *

Quote for the day:
That was the terrible thing about concupiscence. The Devil and the World were easily dealt with: one could appraise coolly what they offered, balance it against eternal damnation, and draw the obvious conclusion. But the temptation of the Flesh was different: they could not be dealt with in cold blood. You could not hear the voice of reason, only the terrible curiosity, insisting that it be satisfied. - David Lodge, The Picturegoers

Friday, October 17, 2003

Have you read today's newspaper?

Apparently, there is a Toilet Recognition of the Year Awards (TROY).

I saw an advertisement for this in today's PDI. Was amused by it. ^_^

Read about it.

I like the bathrooms in Old Spaghetti House (Katipunan) and Sonia's Garden. ^_^

Thursday, October 16, 2003

What is Your Destiny? by Valcion
Date when you fufill your destinyJanuary 14, 2017
Created with quill18's MemeGen!

To the peeps who read my blog:
I'll be out of town this weekend and I've applied for international roaming. Try to remember not to text me because you'll be charged for it.

Wednesday, October 15, 2003

Currently listening to: Tori Amos' Scarlets' Walk album

Considering it was Wednesday and a dead day at the store (deader than usual), I managed to get a lot of things done:

- won one game of Neopets against C (this is after losing x number of times from about 11am to 2pm -- each game lasts about 8 to 10 minutes, do the math ... and find out what x is equal to ^_^)

- drew my blacksmith character on M's scratch/sketch pad. I cannot draw to save my life, but she insisted and I drew. She had a lovely .3 tip pen -- I could not resist! ^_^

We also invented two new creatures: a SnaGerDal (I drew a snake with tiger stripes and dalmatian dots) and a SnaBuBu (a bunny with bug antenna's and a snake tongue) -- isn't this just the cutest name? ^_^

- bought ice cream! (pistachio, double dutch and the new Selecta sundae series: Blueberry Cheesecake) and a shedload of orange juice (I feel a tickle in my throat and this is not a good time for me to get sick. Been taking massive doses of Vitamin C.)

- read the first half of the first set of readings for my comprehensive exams. (My reading list is 8 pages long.)

- thought about the project and discussed it with E and C. When I'm ready, I will discuss it here.

Am reading AS Byatt's A Biographer's Tale. This is the nth time I'm reading this book, but I've never finished it. It just gets too technical and unwieldy for my liking, but I'm hoping to finish it this time.

This pleases me:
A few days ago, a friend asked me if I was okay. I was a bit surprised with the question because, when I took stock of myself, I realized that I'm fairly satisfied with how my life is going right now: thesis chapter one is done, comprehensive exam is in February, thesis defense during the summer, etc. That aside, life has been good to me -- I want for nothing.

Strangest thing said to me:
"You look like a nun." (Mukha kang madre) -- bumped into former co-teachers while picking up the pictures I had developed and one of them said this. I don't know how to take it.

From Louisa May Alcott's Little Women:
If people really want to go, and really try all their lives, I think they will get in, for I don't believe there are any locks on that door or any guards at the gate. - Laurie, about heaven

* * *

Went through old papers and notes and found this written on one of my notebooks:
"In order to give light, you must first be willing to burn." (I think one of the senior teachers in Xavier said this at our colloquiom)

Tuesday, October 14, 2003

Took this test from B's blog.

What Type of Villain are You?

will add more later ...

Monday, October 13, 2003

Quote for today:
Every one sees what you appear to be, few really know what you are... Machiavelli, The Prince, Chapter 18

So, let me tell you about my day:

I did a good deed at the library today. I needed to have some essays photocopied and thought now would be a good time to have it done. (Exam Week = few people in lib having stuff photocopied) I was looking for my books through the OPAC and overheard the students using the computer beside me. (I don't usually eavesdrop, but--) It seems they were looking for Lit Theory books (Said) and were having a hard time looking for it (kept searching for post-modernism). I recommended David Lodge's book (Modern Criticism and Theory: A Reader) to them and pointed them to the shelf. It turns out, one of their groupmates was my niece (yes, NIECE -- daughter of my cousin. I had a dozen nephews and nieces by the time I was 14) and I showed them other books that they could read on the topic. (Eagleton's Literary Theory: An Introduction and Ashcroft, Griffiths & Tiffin's Empire Writes Back).

I wonder, though, why Freshmen are required to read Lit Theory. Oh well.

Offered to have a friend's rolls of film develop (lent her my HOLGA and was just as excited to see what she could do with it). Dropped by the Fuji near my place to have it developed.

B**ch Moment:
It seems one of the rolls of film was for slides and had to be processed differently. The owner asked me if I wanted it cross-processed (they would develop it as normal film and would make for an interesting picture because the colors are different). I asked him how it would be done and this person beside me (I think they were hanging out there) laughed. I ignored it. The owner explained the process and so I told him that he can use his discretion so I can have the best picture quality possible. It seems that it would take longer if I wanted it processed as a slide film, so I told them to process it like regular film. The girl beside me laughed again.

I wanted to say to her: "shut up, you ugly person." (in my book, anyone who is insensitive enough to laugh at a moment like that is ugly.) But I decided to just be quiet.

Moment over.

I decided to get my bro some more Neopets TCG packs (and was rewarded by getting really good rares. H'ray!) ^_^

At the library today, while waiting for my stuff to be photocopied, I decided to check out the books I had pulled out. One of them, apparently, was so old that the last time it had been borrowed was in 1975. I miss library cards (the ones you find at the back of books that keeps a record of who borrowed it), I miss being able to see who else had read that book and when.

There is actually a study regarding this (I forget the term) -- the history of a book's ownership (bookplates, marginalia, etc.), but with modern technology, I wonder how future scholars are going to do this to our books.


My sister and I didn't get to watch Daredevil (ended up watching Matrix: Reloaded). Will try to watch it some time this week.

Today's quiz result:
holding hands
hand holding - you like to be in constant physical
contact with your special someone but you don't
want to take things too quickly.

What Sign of Affection Are You?
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Sunday, October 12, 2003


The ULTIMATE personality test
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Hmmm... I'm not sure I agree with the results. (But I like Sarah Michelle Gellar, so... ^_^)

* * *

It is a quiet day. Just had lunch with sibs and picked up a copy of Dan Brown's Da Vinci Code (in paperback!). I also updated my lomohome with some pictures I took when I went home to Iloilo and some random other pictures taken to use up the roll of film.

Got a copy of Matrix Reloaded on VCD. (Will wait to purchase boxed set when all three films come out)

Tonight, my sister and I plan to watch Daredevil. (We bought the local DVD because it has -- get this, Tagalog Subtitles!) ^_^

Well, that's it for now. TTFN!

Saturday, October 11, 2003

For the Harry Potter fans out there:
Emma Thompson has been cast to play Sybill Trelawney, the divinations professor. (I am excited! She's one of my favorite actresses.)

* * *

Today's quote is from my beloved WH Auden:
Pick a quarrel, go to war,
Leave the hero in the bar;
Hunt the lion, climb the peak:
No one guesses you are weak.

* * *

Today was excellent:
- very good, old friends (from our theater-watching days) visited and it was a blast talking to them (it really made our morning ^_^)

- accompanied D to Booktopia. It was raining so hard, we decided to seek refuge in Shopwise (my first time there!) and I was able to find my bro his Candy Corn (h'ray!). Booktopia is a wonderful bookstore! They had this book (Balzac and the Little Chinese Seamstress, which I've been wanting to get for a really long time. (I saw the movie adaptation and loved it -- actually saw it twice!)

They have all of the the Onion books. (Which I also wanted to get. ~sigh~)

Will now devote my energies to convincing my sister to drive me there.

- played a few games of Neopets TCG with C and lost. (But it was fun! I'm still trying to figure out a strategy for this game.) Definitely need to get more cards, though.

- found out that I might get a chance to see Quentin Tarantino's Kill Bill next weekend. ^_^

- had a really great time on the drive home with my sibs. (traffic was terrible, but we were all tanked up on sugar so ...)

Right now, am trying to decide which movie to watch for the evening. (Last night's Royal Tenenbaums was wonderful. I slept very well after. ^_^)

Friday, October 10, 2003

Quote for the day:
We are the artists, the lovers, the dreamers.
We cannot save this world, but we can make it worth saving.

* * *

the stars are high on sugar
and i marvel
at their carnival-color twinkle
as the lights reflect on them

it seems the sky is still and silent
allowing the festival to be
and the darkness
becomes blue, orange, yellow and red
all at the same time

they reach perfection
on a saccharine high
and i dance
to the sound of their cosmic laughter

* * *

I went to see my thesis advisor and he's finally giving me a grade for Lit295. (H'ray!) So from now until February, I will be reading and reading and reading to prepare for the comprehensive exam.

I'm glad Chapter 1 is done. This was the annoying part of the thesis. (The other annoying part would be having to defend my thesis when I finish it. ugh! =P)

My celebration tonight will consist of microwave popcorn and The Royal Tenenbaums.

Have a great weekend, everyone! ^_^

* * *

Watched Finding Nemo (ty, E!) and enjoyed it. Can't wait to get a DVD copy of it. ^_^

Thursday, October 09, 2003

(In the initial post, this was after my discussion of the Magdalene Sisters)
On a lighter note--

This is fun:
1. Go to
2. Type in: weapons of mass destruction
3. Click "I'm feeling lucky"
4. ^_^

Repeat the process, but type "french military victories"

* * *

Had a fab day--

Highlights of the morning:
the movie
lunch & dessert
... the whole morning, basically ^_^
(Thanks, G! ^_^)

Now, about the movie I'd been dying to watch (and finally did today):

***Spoiler Alert***
***Spoiler Alert***
***Spoiler Alert***

"Magdalene Sisters" was everything I expected it to be and more.

The story is set in very Catholic Ireland during the 1960s. Named after Mary Magdalene, the Magdalene Asylum was a house for "fallen women". The focus of the movie are on four characters: Margaret, Rose/Patricia, Crispina/Harriet and Bernadette. These women were sent to the asylum for different reasons but it all boiled down to the fact that they were *women*. ~sigh~

An early scene in the movie shows Margaret, Rose and Bernadette being instructed by the Head Nun of the asylum (Sister Bridget) on why they are there. (women as a "moral danger" that should pay for their sins, can only be cleansed through work, blahblahblah) It is interesting to note that, as this scene is played out, the audience never get to see the face of the nun, only her hands as they count wads of bills. (Throughout the movie, Sister Bridget would be seen counting money, rolling them into nice, neat rolls and tossing them into cookie tins.)

Peter Mullan (director) establishes that Sister Bridget loves money and money is what personifies Sister Bridget. (Ah, but this proves to be her undoing in the end.)

What's in a Name?
Sister Bridget proceeds to ask the three girls for their names. When it is Rose's turn, Sister Bridget informs her that they already have a Rose and that she should find herself another name. A person's name is his mark in this world. It is the essence of a person's individuality. The girls try to articulate their identity (= articulate self), but this is promptly dismissed by 'the power that be'/Sister Bridget/B**ch from Hell(= not be part of social process).

**Nice soundbyte: "There is no known culture that does not use the pronoun 'I' and which does not therefore have a conception of self and personhood. -Chris Barker, Cultural Studies: Theory and Practice

Another inmate of the asylum, Crispina also experienced the same thing. There is a connection between Rose/Patricia and Crispina as they both had babies out of wedlock. When Crispina introduces herself to Rose/Patricia, she tells Patricia that her name means 'girl with the curly hair.' (This is odd because Crispina has very short and very straight hair.) She later reveals that the nuns gave her that name.

There is a preoccupation with names in this movie. In a later scene, Bernadette 'seduces' a delivery boy into helping her escape. The boy reluctantly agrees, but ends up backing out, claiming that he didn't even know her name. The girls never introduce themselves to one another and hardly speak to each other.

Every day, they stand in line and wash, dry and press clothes. In one scene, Crispina tosses a piece of clothing to Margaret, telling her that 'she doesn't wash whites.' (Fordist?)

So there they were, without names or families or explanations on what they were doing there. Abandoned, betrayed, forgotten by the very people they trusted and loved.

Like the first Magdalene, these women suffered.
Like Mary Magdalene, these women were misunderstood and written off.

So, is there redemption in the end?
After four years, Margaret's brother rushes into the asylum and "rescues" her. Margaret is in shock, she couldn't believe it was that easy; that all it took was a father or a brother to go there and get her. While packing her bags, her brother tells her to hurry. (Loved this part:) Margaret tells her brother that he has no right to tell her to hurry; that he doesn't know what she had gone through. She shoves her luggage at him and walks ahead.

Eventually, Rose/Patricia and Bernadette also escape. As Rose/Patricia boards the bus, Bernadette's cousin wishes her well, calling her Patricia. Rose/Patricia turns around and tells her that her name is Rose. In the end, Rose/Patricia finally finds the courage to claim her identity and to speak her name.

Peter Mullan presents a stark and vivid image of society's distrust and fear of women in the mid-20th century. There is no effort to glamorize the characters or the situation. It is all done very plainly (hardly any background music), as though the director wants the "truth" to speak for itself.

Is it really the truth? Mullan has been accused of being biased against the Catholic Church (the Vatican has condemned this movie). There were several scenes that showed the nuns in a somewhat sympathetic light: one could see how uneasy and uncomfortable the nuns were while the priest was filming them (to them, acting natural is standing rather stiffly.) Sister Bridget was excited over a movie and cried through it, and in the end, when she had to choose between the key to the front gate or the key to the safe where all her money was, she showed how "weak her flesh" was when she chose the latter.

Bottom line: I'm glad I watched this movie. (I'm still going to Church on Sunday. ^_^)

If you want to know more about the Magdalene Asylums, click here

Wednesday, October 08, 2003

Found this in a random blog I decided to visit:
STRESSED is DESSERTS spelled backwards. ^_^

And this one is my favorite by Dorothy Parker:
Razors pain you;
Rivers are damp;
Acids stain you;
And drugs cause cramp.
Guns aren't lawful;
Nooses give;
Gas smells awful;
You might as well live.

* * *

Submitted (what I hope) is my final draft of Chapter 1/Thesis Proposal. Meeting with my thesis advisor this Friday (I'm hoping to submit a draft of Chapter 2).

I just want to get this over with!

* * *

Looking forward to watching Magdalene Sisters tomorrow with G. This was one of the movies my bro and I planned to watch at the HKIFF, but there was that whole SARS bit. I'm glad I'm getting another chance to watch it. ^_^

Tuesday, October 07, 2003

Questions for this evening:

Are Charlson Ong's stories helpful in dismantling these structures of knowledge and images of the Chinese Filipino? Does he replace them with new structures or does he reinforce them?

How does Orientalism apply to Chinese-Filipino writing?

These are questions that I have to address in my Conceptual Framework. (Notice, no mention of Foucault ~hee hee~ I was pretty happy about not seeing any corrections or questions in the Foucault section of my Framework. ^_^)

* * *

Am now the happy owner of Dido's first album. (H'ray!) Apparently,

D had it and was willing to sell it for a song. And there I was looking for it in Megamall and Power Plant (got very annoyed with the service of Music1/Tower in Powerbooks Megamall).

This is what I got from Fully Booked last Sunday. I wonder if this is the same David Lodge who is the editor of our English Lit bible (Modern Criticism and Theory).

The covers were so pretty (and quite affordable, considering where I was) so I decided to try one book. (Not that I have the time to read it right now. ~sigh~)
Ugh ... now I remember why it took so long for me to start drinking again.

It is 4 in the morning and I am awake. Erg. >_<

Oh well, there _is_ a thesis chapter that needs to be revised (and one the needs to be written.)

On the bright side, I spent the evening re-reading Auden and rediscovered why I loved this poet so much. (Read his treatise on the unwritten love poem. Galing! ^_^)

And I wrote a poem last night. (H'ray!) But I have to fix it up pa.

- - -> Back to our regular programming =P

... a few minutes later:
C'est moi, procrastinator.

I open my thesis file and type the question Jonathan has been asking me all along. "How does Charlson Ong figure into this whole discussion about the discourse on the Chinese Filipino?" That's how much I've typed since 4.

How _does_ he figure into all this? (It is a time like this when I wish I had fought to get my other thesis topic approved. ~sigh~)

Currently reading Nick Joaquin's "Culture as History" to find the answer. (I have an answer in my head, but I need someone with more say to back me up.)

... I am amused by my own blog entry.

Oh, and I finally found this:
The Charolastra Manifesto (from Y Tu Mama Tambien)
1. No hay honor mas grande que ser un charolastra.
2. Cada cual puede hacer de su culo un papalote.
3. Pop mata poesi­a.
4. Un "toque" al di­a... la llave de la alegri­a.
5. No te tiraras a la vieja de otro charolastra.
6. Puto el que le vaya al America.
7. Que muera la moral y que viva la chaqueta.
8. Prohibido casarse con una virgen.
9. Puto el que le vaya al America (se repite).
10. La "neta" es chida pero inalcanzable.

No. 2 Everyone can do with their life what they want.
No. 3 Pop kills poetry
No. 10 The truth is really amazing but totally unattainable.

... isn't it amazing how much non-thesis work I can accomplish while working on my thesis? ^_^

currently listening to:
Salva Nos (Noir OST)
A New Day Has Come (Celine Dion)
Pachelbel's Kanon (My Sassy Girl OST)
You Were Always on My Mind (Elvis Presley)

Progress Report:
Just need to rearrange my Review of Related Literature and discuss how Said's Orientalism applies to Chinese Filipino Writing.

... sooooo close. ~sigh~

Monday, October 06, 2003

I'm sitting here with a glass of Singapore Sling (made of Dry Gin, Benedictine D.O.M., Cointreau, Cherry Brandy, Grenadine, etc. etc.) mixed with Sprite beside me. I had planned to do this last night (drink, I mean) but I didn't have Sprite then. We do have a bottle of wine, but it wasn't chilled yet. (And I didn't want to drink Tequila, because it isn't a drink to nurse)

I sound like a lush, don't I? (I'm not. This is the first time I'm drinking an alcoholic beverage in a really long time -- about 2 years?)

Currently enjoying: Dido's Life for Rent and the song in my head is "White Flag". It has been a while since I bought any new CDs (I guess that comes from liking classical music -- for a while, my sister and I were content listening to the many versions of Giuseppi Tartini's "The Devil's Trill Sonata" we had collected).

So far, two glasses and nothing. Maybe the alcohol content of the Sling has evaporated.

Oh well.

For those peeps texting me, I apologize if I don't reply as often. I am currently trying to get used to the Ericsson interface (and failing miserably). Please allow 6 to 10 days for response. ^_^ (And I don't know how to do smileys on the Ericsson ... so, sorry also if my replies aren't smiley-filled.)

You are MARLIN!
What Finding Nemo Character are You?

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Not that I know who this character is. (Missed the movie ~sniff~)

Thesis Burnout

All I need to do before the semester ends is to submit a revised draft of my Chapter 1. I've been percolating the ideas for some time now and I know what I need to write.

So why is it that, when I sat down to write it, I had a visual image of the completed, revised draft but I couldn't write it down on paper? Something in me is impatient that I can't get something that is done (mentally), done in reality.

Did that make any sense at all?

Oh, new stuff I got yesterday: Dido's latest album and Lisa Ono's Dans Mon Ile (French Bossa Nova singer -- E got me started listening to Bossa Nova ^_^)

It is 7:33am -- I have about 30 minutes to get my act together. ~sigh~

On the other hand, it is 12 days before I go on a 3-day vacation. (H'ray!)

Sunday, October 05, 2003

Can you say "Thwart"?

This seems to be the catchword for the day -- thwart.

We set out to Power Plant to try to watch "Underworld" only to discover that they had "removed" the movie. (Something to do with the MTRCB) So we decide to just go around to check for stuff and then go to have lunch at Blue Bacon Cafe in San Juan.

Then we try to look for my bro's Halloween candy (candy corn, etc. etc.) -- T adores this holiday because of the candy. We couldn't find any -- not in Candy Corner or in Rustan's Fresh. ~sigh~ He had to content himself with gummi bears.

Then we went to Fully Booked to check for any new Terry Pratchett books (or anything my brothers hadn't read yet) -- no luck.


I felt a bit bad because I was able to get some of the stuff I needed (I was in the market for new skirts and shirts -- oh, and a new watch because my other watch died again.)

A new discovery is Mosaic, a clothing shop in Power Plant. I'd been interested in checking them out for some time now, but could never do so because my sibs don't like it when I'm "bush whacking". It was a good thing Mosaic is very close to Candy Corner so I snuck in. ^_^

Okay, this is the part I love ~tee hee~
I automatically pick the items that are in my size and I asked the salesperson if I could try it on. She looked at me and told me that what I had chosen might be too big for me and proceeded to pick the size she thought was right for me. (They fit perfectly. ^_^) So I am now the proud owner of two relatively inexpensive pieces of clothing from Mosaic. I will have my brothers buy me more clothes from them during Christmas. (I love having new clothes to wear. ^_^)

And then there was lunch. Blue Bacon Cafe is a bit inaccessible, but we'd been wanting to try that place for a really long time. Since we were thwarted with almost everything else today, we decided to just go for it. Lunch was an amazing experience! The servers were efficient and friendly and the food was (to borrow E's phrase) ab fab. It's a bit pricey, though, so be prepared to spend a little bit more.

* * *

Semi-funny/Slightly disturbing observation today:

There is a derma/beauty clinic in the same building as Blue Bacon Cafe and they had a list of the services they offered. One of them is groin peel/bleach.

I don't know why people would have it done. I don't want to know how they do it.

I don't want to know.

Decided to transfer my journal to blogger.

I decided to move because my other journal doesn't allow for any customization. (Not that I can handle html... but, it's the thought that counts.)

Had thought to move all of the entries here manually, but that journal did hold about two years of my life so... no. ^_^

My sibs and I plan to go see Underworld today. I'm hoping the theaters won't be so crowded because I am looking forward to "buying the bucket".

It's 7-something in the am and I'm just waiting for my pRO character to regenerate before playing again.

Will definitely change the layout to this page ... I just have to convince one of my bros to do it for me.